1186-The Fruit of the Spirit - Self-Control#
1186-The Fruit of the Spirit - Self-Control
(JP Text Group - Organized by Yun Dan Feng Qing)
The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, we especially thank and praise you for your grace. You desire for us to live out the fruit of the Spirit in our lives, which is extremely beneficial for our lives. Today, through this time, help us to know you more through your word. Let us receive the supply that comes from you, and live out as much as we receive. Holy Spirit, help us understand your word and give us more revelation. Guide this time ahead, we pray in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, Amen!
The original meaning of self-control is: self-discipline. In English, it means self-restraint and having self-control. Paul mentions self-control as the last fruit of the Spirit. Without self-control, we cannot apply the previous fruits. Let’s look at this scripture;
Proverbs 16:32: He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.
Here, to rule one’s spirit means self-control. If a person can control their temper and not get angry, they are braver than a warrior. If a person can restrain their heart and not be stirred by the emotions and words of others, that is quite rare, stronger than taking a city! Self-control is difficult, but we do not rely on ourselves; we rely on the power of the Holy Spirit. We have the power of the Holy Spirit to control our emotions and our words and actions. Without the help of the Holy Spirit, it is very difficult to bear the fruit of self-control. Self-control is through the Holy Spirit helping each person manage our own time and thoughts.
The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of truth, and also the guiding Spirit, the Spirit of revelation and wisdom. The Holy Spirit produces nine different attributes of fruit, which are nine spiritual virtues. The last of the nine fruits is self-control, which is a very beautiful virtue. If a person lacks self-control, they may lose many of their achievements. If a person has no control over their temper, they may not know when they will get angry. If a person has no control over their words, they may speak slanderous words at inappropriate times. Therefore, self-control is very important and is also the last fruit revealed by the Holy Spirit.
Love without self-control becomes indulgence; joy without self-control can be unbearable; peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, all require self-control. God begins with love and ends with self-control; this is orderly, allowing us to have a beginning and an end in our actions. The fruit of self-control allows us to act with moderation and wisdom.
Sharing point one: Imitating the Example of Christ
The Lord Jesus was full of power, but He also had self-control. Before Jesus began His ministry, He was led by the Holy Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.
Matthew 4:1, Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.
The Israelites failed in the wilderness, but Jesus, as a man, was led into the wilderness and overcame these temptations. Many times, we feel that our lives have hit rock bottom, which is equivalent to being in the wilderness. Please do not forget that Jesus has already triumphed in the wilderness. According to the flesh, no one wants to go into the wilderness because there is no supply there, only high temperatures and desolation, unsuitable for human habitation. But Jesus obeyed the guidance of the Holy Spirit and became our example.
Jesus fasted for forty days in the wilderness and was hungry. At this time, the devil came to tempt Him. The first temptation was: If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become bread. The devil usually attacks the weakest part of a person when they are most vulnerable. The devil's purpose in tempting is to hope that people will weaken, fall, and distance themselves from God! If Jesus forgot His identity at this moment and used His authority to turn stones into bread, it would open the door to selfish desires. If today He turned stones into bread for Himself, tomorrow He might turn the table into gold to satisfy Himself.
Jesus quickly saw through the devil's scheme. Although Jesus had authority and power, He had self-control. What is self-control? It is the ability to do something but choosing not to do it. Although the word self-control does not appear in this text, what He did was self-control in itself. He did not fall for the devil's trick; He used the word of God to overcome the devil.
Matthew 4:3-4
And the tempter came and said to Him, “If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become bread.” But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.’”
Jesus quoted Deuteronomy 8:2-3
And you shall remember that the Lord your God led you all the way these forty years in the wilderness, to humble you and test you, to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not. So He humbled you, allowed you to hunger, and fed you with manna which you did not know nor did your fathers know, that He might make you know that man shall not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that proceeds from the mouth of the Lord.
Although Jesus had the power to turn stones into bread, He chose to obey the will of the Father because He knew that He was not living by bread alone but by the word of God. This is self-control. Jesus understood the will of the Father very well. He knew that the devil was tempting Him, trying to lead Him away from the will of the Father, which was material.
Matthew 4:5-7
Then the devil took Him up into the holy city, set Him on the pinnacle of the temple, and said to Him, “If you are the Son of God, throw Yourself down. For it is written: ‘He shall give His angels charge over you,’ and, ‘In their hands they shall bear you up, lest you dash your foot against a stone.’” Jesus said to him, “It is written again, ‘You shall not tempt the Lord your God.’”
The second temptation is about the lust of the eyes. If a person lacks self-control in this area, they will fall into vain glory. Here, the devil quoted scripture from Psalm 91;
Psalm 91:11-12 For He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways. In their hands they shall bear you up, lest you dash your foot against a stone.
The devil also knows the Bible, but he twists the scripture. He quoted the Bible to tempt Jesus, saying, “Jump down from here. Doesn’t the scripture say that He will command His angels to hold you up? You will be fine.” Is the devil right in using this scripture? Definitely not.
Although this statement is entirely from the Bible, Psalm 91 is saying, as you become a child of God, as a member of the Lord, wherever you go, He will surely protect you. Although there may be dangers on the way, your God will command His angels to protect you, and they will bear you up, lest you dash your foot against a stone. When you face danger on your path, your God will surely help you; this is the content of Psalm 91. But the devil used a method of taking scripture out of context, pulling out a part to make Jesus deliberately test God.
God's promise tells us that no matter where we go, He will be with us because He is our help and our protection at all times. Even though you do not know what dangers lie ahead, God knows. When danger comes, God will intervene to prevent harm from coming upon you; this is what the scripture is expressing.
But this does not mean that you should deliberately put yourself in danger to prove that God will protect you, expecting Him to save you; that is testing God. The devil was tempting Jesus in this way. It is not saying, “Go ahead, try it. Jump down from above, and God will surely catch you.” Jesus saw through the devil's trick.
He answered with Deuteronomy 6:16: You shall not tempt the Lord your God.
When a person's heart is filled with the word of God, they possess self-control. The devil tempts and entices people, but one can overcome using the word of God. If the word of God is not present in the heart, how can one resist the devil?
Matthew 4:8-9
Again, the devil took Him up on an exceedingly high mountain, and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. And he said to Him, “All these things I will give You if You will fall down and worship me.”
Brothers and sisters, whose are the riches and glory of the world? They are given to us by God! God gave this world to Adam, but our first ancestor Adam handed over the authority to the devil. The devil said to Jesus, “You came to save this rebellious people. Now there is a better way. Just fall down and worship me, and I will give you everything. It’s that simple; just worship me, and it will all be yours.”
He knew that the Father is the source of all blessings, and the Father had prepared a path for Him, and that path would surely be the most blessed. Jesus quoted Deuteronomy 6:13: You shall fear the Lord your God and serve Him, and shall take oaths in His name. Self-control is once again manifested in Jesus Christ. He willingly walked the path of the cross, willingly obeying the will of the Father.
If a person lacks self-control when faced with temptation, will they follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit or their flesh? Many times, people will follow their fleshly feelings.
Christians in the world will also face many temptations. We should imitate Jesus Christ, using the word of God to resist the devil's temptations, and through the word of God, possess the character of self-control, allowing us to overcome certain things.
When these temptations come, if we follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit in our hearts, knowing that what God gives us is the best, we will have a heart of self-control. When you truly know God, for your own spiritual blessings or for the benefit of others, you will refrain from doing certain things. The character of self-control will emerge because it is the fruit of the Holy Spirit.
Let’s look at an example from the Bible, Paul’s self-control:
1 Corinthians 8:8-13
But food does not commend us to God; for neither if we eat are we the better, nor if we do not eat are we the worse. But beware lest somehow this liberty of yours become a stumbling block to those who are weak. For if anyone sees you who have knowledge eating in an idol’s temple, will not the conscience of him who is weak be emboldened to eat those things offered to idols? And because of your knowledge shall the weak brother perish, for whom Christ died? But when you thus sin against the brethren, and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if food makes my brother stumble, I will never again eat meat, lest I make my brother stumble.
When Paul interacted with others, he considered their feelings. He tried to avoid causing others to stumble regarding food. Some may ask if Christians can eat blood. Paul’s point is very clear: food does not commend us to God. The key is not the food, but some people have weak faith. If we do this, it may cause some to be weak. So it is not about whether we can eat, but whether we are willing to. When we know that God has prepared the best communion for us, why choose animal blood?
This passage encourages us to have self-control and to consider others' perspectives. We choose not to eat for the sake of others not stumbling. This is the fruit of self-control. Because I am not living for myself now, but representing Christ in this world.
Sharing point two: Self-Control is a Regulator of Spiritual Character
Does the fruit of the Spirit, kindness, require self-control? Some may ask if helping others requires self-control. Let me tell you a story. A famous philanthropist was hosting guests at home when a young, disheveled beggar barged in.
He said, “You wealthy officials, have pity on me.”
The philanthropist replied, “Go help me in the backyard, and I will pay you.”
The beggar was very dissatisfied and said, “I have never seen such a stingy person. If you don’t want to give me charity, that’s fine, but you even want me to work for you…”
He angrily walked away.
The philanthropist ignored the beggar and continued talking business with his guests.
Someone then asked, “Mr. Philanthropist, may I ask you a question? You are a philanthropist, but the way you treated that penniless beggar just now, doesn’t it tarnish your reputation? Why wouldn’t you help him?”
The philanthropist replied, “Once, a little boy saw a pupa struggling to break out of its shell. The boy, with good intentions, used scissors to cut open the shell to help it come out faster. But when the creature emerged, it died shortly after. A normal pupa, breaking out of its shell, would have strong wings to fly. The boy’s help, although well-meaning, caused it to lose its life.”
The philanthropist continued, “I do not feel that my reputation is affected by this. I want that beggar to earn a living with his own hands. He is so young and healthy; he can completely support himself. If I unconditionally give to such a person, he will gradually lose the awareness of labor and become greedy. I will not give him money for nothing; that would harm him. People must understand that kindness also requires self-control.
Love without self-control is indulgence. God loves us unconditionally, but it is definitely not indulgence. It is a love with self-control. In our church, there was a case where a child, who had not yet lost his baby teeth, lost all his teeth because he particularly loved eating candy. His mother never controlled him; if he wanted it, she would give it to him. As a result, the child lost his teeth because of his love for candy. Is this real love? This is love without self-control, which ultimately harmed him.
God’s love is self-controlled. He knows when and where to do the right thing, which is best for you. It is at the right time and place that He will accomplish the most perfect things for you. It is absolutely not like some people think that as long as we pray, God will immediately fulfill it; that is not God’s love for us.
God wants to give you the best and most suitable at the right time. For example, you would not give a five-year-old a Rolls Royce because they cannot drive yet and do not understand the value of a car. When they grow up and have the ability to drive and understand the value, that is when it is best for them.
Many times, because we do not understand God’s intentions, we pray for God to help us accomplish something. When God has not fulfilled it, we immediately become angry and discouraged, thinking that God does not love us. In fact, God has always loved you, but His love is self-controlled. Every time you pray, God listens attentively. He does not neglect your every cry, even if you forget, God does not forget. He will fulfill it at the most suitable time for you. Sometimes, God does not fulfill it immediately because He is using certain circumstances to build our character and expand our capacity so that we can bear greater blessings.
Does joy require self-control? Proverbs 14:13: Even in laughter the heart may sorrow, and the end of mirth may be grief.
If joy reaches extremes, it can lead to sorrow. The explanation in the Bible is very accurate; extreme joy leads to grief, so joy must have self-control. One cannot be joyful without regard for the occasion. If you go to a friend’s house where the family is not smiling, dressed in black, with serious expressions because they are mourning, and you say, “You all must be joyful; the Bible says to rejoice always…” If you are joyful without regard for the occasion, it is not beneficial for everyone. Therefore, joy needs self-control.
Does peace require self-control? Without self-control, blindly compromising can lead to worse outcomes. We desire peace, but it must have principles; otherwise, it is all temporary.
Does patience require self-control? It requires it even more! If one is simply patient while others are riding on their necks, will you still be patient? The Bible says to love our enemies, if someone strikes you on one cheek, turn the other cheek; if someone takes your outer garment, give them your inner garment as well. If someone compels you to go one mile, go with them two miles… It seems the Bible teaches this, but why does it say that patience needs self-control? The self-control in patience means we have our principles; we do not need to compromise on things that do not align with the Bible.
Recently, while communicating with a sister, she mentioned that after reading the four Gospels, she found that the twelve disciples were quite troublesome. Jesus led them for over three years, always being patient with them, giving them time to grow. But with the hypocritical Pharisees, Jesus did not show patience; instead, He pointed out their problems directly. Why did Jesus not have patience with them? Because these people were self-righteous, thinking they were very good, strictly adhering to the law, and unwilling to believe in the words of Jesus Christ. Jesus did not continue to be patient with them; in order to save them, He first tore off their masks.
The fruit of the Holy Spirit all requires self-control. Self-control is like a regulating valve; it is equivalent to the valve on your home’s water pipe, which can control the flow of water. If we remove the valve of self-control, all spiritual fruits will have problems and become indulgent, leading to pride. If the valve is opened very small, it will become bondage. Self-control is a valve; we need to have self-control in spiritual virtues, such as controlling our temper and being patient.
We share point three: A person with self-control can bear greater rewards.
Why must we have self-control? Because God wants to place greater rewards upon you. In the ancient Greek Olympics, the ultimate winner received a crown made of laurel branches, which was placed on the winner’s head. The crown itself is not worth much, but winning and wearing the crown is a great honor. Those who want to receive the crown must undergo rigorous training, determining what they should and should not do regarding sleep and diet, even their posture is regulated. This is self-control. Those who have served in the military know that standing at attention has strict regulations; it is not just how you want to stand. The steps also have certain requirements. There are very strict standards. The achievements of athletes stem from their training; while we are sleeping, they are training. They have self-control that we cannot achieve, bearing pressures that others cannot bear. Athletes train with heavy sandbags on their legs; the training is tough, but when they finally receive the crown, that is their reward. This is what Paul wants to tell us, Christians must strive for rewards and receive the crown of glory that God gives us.
Paul says in 1 Corinthians 9:25: And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown.
Worldly athletes strive for the crown. They compete vigorously and do everything with self-control. Athletes must have self-control in their diet; they cannot do as they please, and they cannot be too fat or too thin; there are strict standards to win the crown and take first place. If you believe in Jesus just to enter the kingdom of heaven, you are already in the kingdom of heaven; there is no need to strive anymore.
Why must we have good behavior? Because you want to receive God’s reward. God wants to give you the most beautiful reward, but each person’s reward is different. Entering the kingdom of heaven has the same conditions, but the rewards in the kingdom of heaven are different. Some people discipline themselves, possess the fruit of self-control, and manage themselves well through the Holy Spirit, bringing benefits to others and glorifying the name of our Lord; this person will have a great reward in the future.
God has placed the reward before you; you just need to run to the finish line, and that reward belongs to you. What speed will you run? You should sprint at your fastest speed because that belongs to you. When you reach the finish line, it will be yours. We willingly help others and have a heart of patience because God has reserved great rewards for us.
Philippians 3:13-14
Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
We are willing to bear the fruit of the Spirit because we have the character of Christ within us, which is beneficial for us. Just like athletes in a race, no athlete is chased by a coach from behind; they willingly sprint forward, with the goal being the finish line. Our goal is Jesus Christ. Paul said, “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” To receive the crown that does not fade away, this is what God wants to give us.
There are many blessings and glories in the kingdom of heaven. How can you receive them? It is when you see the mark of Jesus Christ and strive forward; this reward is yours. This reward is not related to entering the kingdom of heaven. When you believe in Jesus, you have already entered the kingdom of heaven. You receive God’s reward through good behavior. Paul finally said that he had finished the race and kept the faith; there is laid up for him a crown of righteousness.
Self-control is often not just for ourselves, but for others to believe in the gospel and believe in Jesus Christ. God is a God full of grace and love; He is slow to anger because God is love. Love considers only the benefit of others. God loves us for our benefit. If we indulge ourselves under grace, it would be a disgrace to the name of the Lord, because we are living as representatives of Christ on earth.
In the Bible, there is a person named Noah. Before the world was destroyed by the flood, Noah was also a person of self-control. The people of that time lived in chaos. The Bible says: Only Noah and his family were righteous before God. When they obeyed God’s word and entered the ark, this family was saved while others were destroyed. After coming out of the ark, they began to thank God. The entire earth was left with only their family of eight. Old Noah became a farmer and planted a vineyard. At this time, he lost self-control, made wine, drank too much, and uncovered himself while asleep. When his children entered and saw his nakedness, he cursed his own child.
If there is no self-control under grace, it becomes indulgence. Others will say, “Aren’t you still a believer in Jesus?” It is not the gospel that has a problem, but the behavior of certain people that is problematic. Behavior is very important; a person without self-control will find it difficult to succeed in what they do.
For example, a person with a quick temper cannot control their emotions; a single harsh word can set them off, indicating that this person lacks self-control. They cannot control their emotions, and a single word can make them lose their reason. The devil loves it when you lose your temper and will use those around you to provoke you, saying things you do not want to hear. If we lack the ability of self-control, it will be very difficult to overcome. But the Holy Spirit will help bear the fruit of self-control, keeping the word of God in your heart so that you can overcome all the temptations of the devil.
Proverbs 10:19-20 In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise. The tongue of the righteous is choice silver; the heart of the wicked is worth little.
If our mouths lack self-control and we say inappropriate things, we will hurt others. In the multitude of words, sin is not lacking. Therefore, restraining the lips is wise; we must be cautious in our speech.
Paul was a person who could control himself, which is why he had a victorious life. Why was he able to be victorious? After he came to know Jesus Christ, he had only one thought: to live is Christ, and to die is gain. Whether living or dying, it is all for Christ; this is a mindset and also self-control.
1 Corinthians 9:26-27
Therefore I run thus: not with uncertainty. Thus I fight: not as one who beats the air. But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.
When Paul preached the gospel, he did not act without consideration. He ran not with uncertainty; he did not do things haphazardly. He was purposeful. He disciplined his body and brought it into subjection. This is self-control.
1 Timothy 3:2-5:
A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence (for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?).
What is the role of a bishop? It is equivalent to an elder in the church, as the original text uses the same word for bishop and elder. What kind of person is qualified to be an elder? What do elders do in the church?
Elders manage the church and are qualified to tell you that your behavior needs correction, that what you are doing will harm the church, or that there are problems in the church that everyone needs to correct. Why are elders qualified to say such words? Because they themselves are such people, with good character, and can serve as bishops.
They must be temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach, not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence.
Many people are unqualified to be elders but act as elders in the church, causing the church to be divided and chaotic. This is not recognized by God.
Deaconess, in the original text, means “woman.” 1 Timothy 3:11: Likewise, their wives must be reverent, not slanderers, temperate, faithful in all things.
In the Bible, God has teachings for every type of person. For women, the Bible teaches to be reverent, meaning your behavior, attire, and hairstyle should be proper; do not dress like an owl. The clothing is not about being good or expensive; it must be decent and appropriate. Additionally, do not be slanderers; do not gossip about others. The self-control here refers to dressing appropriately and not slandering. Be faithful to God and to the church.
For older men, Titus 2:2: Older men are to be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience.
Older men in the church must first have self-control. Older men are treasures in the church and role models for the young. They should be sober and temperate, pure and blameless in faith, love, and patience. Older men with love will inspire young people to learn from them.
For example, many young people have lost faith in marriage, wondering if true love exists in the world. But when they come to church and see a loving elderly couple, their hearts will be reignited with faith in true love, realizing that there is indeed love in Christ. If older people are all divorced, young people will also lose faith in marriage. Therefore, older people are very important as role models. Their words and actions are examples for the young. Older people, in their old age, should have a heart of patience, which is a model for us to learn from. Only in this way can the church truly be united, as everyone knows their identity and understands their responsibilities.
The last is for men. Brothers, please read carefully, 1 Timothy 2:8: I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting.
God understands men very well. It is difficult for men to control their tempers. Sometimes men argue over winning or losing. The characteristic of men is to want to conquer the world, believing their viewpoint is correct. But God tells us not to argue over winning or losing; debating doubts is of no benefit. In the church, brothers should not debate doubtful matters because you do not understand the truth of the matter. Do not jump to conclusions about who is right or wrong. Men should lift up holy hands and pray everywhere, practicing more in prayer. The Holy Spirit knows everyone’s hearts, so the Bible tells us how to act. These are all fruits of the Holy Spirit. Under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, the church is united.
Let us pray together:
Heavenly Father, thank you for the grace you have given us. You desire for us to bear the fruit of the Spirit and to pass on grace through us. Please use us, renewing our thoughts and minds through your word, so that we may live out the glory of Christ.
Heavenly Father, thank you for loving us so much. As the new week begins, please help us to know you more through your word. May everyone bear the fruit of the Spirit, which is beneficial for us and for those around us, manifesting the glory of Christ through us. We pray in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen!